Incremental Progress

Locked.  Again.

During my travel home from an out-of-town business trip on Thursday, I was once more seized with the need to be locked up.  There's just something Pavlovian about heading home.  So when I got to the house, I put on the Holy Trainer 2.  After unpacking luggage and getting some things done around the house, I went to bed.

Wow.  That was a short post, huh?  Oh, wait... there's more.

I awoke only an hour after I fell asleep and -- it's important to understand that I have no idea why I did this -- logged onto keysafe.org to get a combination.  Then I locked the HT keys AND the safe emergency keys away for the weekend.  Yiy!  Some people just sleepwalk.  I sleeplock.  Quick... update the DSM V, or VI, or LCXVII or whatever version they're on now.

Actually, I've really enjoyed being locked "for real."  I had cleared my calendar -- the first weekend I've had to just relax and do what I want in months -- so there have been no real barriers.  I should get access again around lunchtime today.  Either that or I'll be warming up the angle grinder.  (For the safe, not the device!)

But the interesting thing is the few experiments I've done in the mean time.  My thought has been that if I can handle the chaffing and other annoyances of being locked, can keep the device (and its contents) clean and sanitary, and I can prevent the prostate from atrophying, then the path to longer-term wear is pretty open.

When I first started attempting to "milk" myself, the results were overwhelming:  I had what felt like a complete orgasm while still locked in the device.  It felt a bit different from a typical orgasm, starting as it did deep inside and not at the head of the penis.  At the time, I thought it was a minor difference.  Since then, though, I've come (excuse the expression) to understand that the early experience was an outlier, likely from the new sensations.

I have been quite able to ejaculate using the prostate massager and a Magic Wand vibrating the device.  But it's a slower, deeper experience.  I've noticed that the "output" is different, too:  more concentrated, and not mixed with pre-cum.  The experience can't be an "every day" affair... every two or three days seems to work; any more frequently can end in maddening frustration and a puddle of anguished sweat.  Critically, when it is over, I don't have the urge to remove the device and pretend that it never happened.  In fact, my submissiveness remains largely -- though not entirely -- in tact.  Over the course of a few minutes, I'm back in subbie land and quite happy to have not been released.

My intent was to remain locked over the weekend and head out on my next trip with the Holy Trainer left behind.  Now, though, I seem to be in a Zone of Equilibrium, okay being locked and okay dealing with the physical issues.  Since this week's trip is a driving trip, I may see about keeping the experiment going.  A week isn't going to kill me, and this could be a good step into my goal of longer periods of lockup.

I'll let you know how it goes.