Stretching

It has been over two weeks since I have been out of the Holy Trainer for more than a few hours of recovery and a thorough cleaning.  In that time, I have limited sexual release to "milking," a procedure that involves a prostate massager (Aneros) and a Hitachi against the HT while kneeling.  It is a very different kind of "release" and exercise of the prostate than a full-on orgasm.  It is less explosive, lasts a lot longer, and feels "deeper" in the body.  It also generates far less fluid and almost no pre-cum.

The purpose of all of this is to find out how my fantasies of being a beta male cuckold map to a partial reality.  It's simply too easy to promise based on desire and find reality to be a disappointment.  Experimentation is a good way to figure out what I am really up for and can deliver.

I have learned that I enjoy being locked up, but I'm not sure where the boundaries of that experience should be.  For now, I'm shooting for a month of lockdown with the keys available and two milkings per week.  After that, who knows?  I'm playing it by ear.

As an aside, I'm finding that my visual tastes are very much in a "public sexy" space right now.  I feel incredibly warm towards nicely-dressed women in general, and helpless to an hourglass presentation.  One-piece swimsuits are my Kryptonite, and that feels so, so delightful.  But an image of a naked female feels like tresspassing.  So "porn" to me right now is a swimsuit Tumblr.  That just adds to the beta cuckold sensation.  For now, that's welcome.